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Author Topic: well today royally sucked  (Read 2624 times)
jedicow
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« on: January 05, 2013, 06:39:41 PM »

sorry to post this here and vent a little....so apologies to all before I post it.


I had to put my best friend of 13 years down today.  his name was Chewbacca and he was a chow/golden retriever mix.  he had been having some hip and back problems for a while which were exacerbated by some type of freak injury in the back yard a few weeks before Christmas.  I was outside watching him and waiting for him to come in and he stopped to "do his business" and then crumpled onto the ground.  long story short, the vet thought he had injured a disc in his back and he seemingly got much better and by the time Christmas rolled around, he was back to his old self and even playing and frolicking more than he had done in the past 2 or 3 years.  around new years, he started getting a little worse again and we figured he was just tired and maybe the arthritis in his hips was bothering him.  then he started having a hacking cough and my wife found him on Thursday lying on the floor in a room he normally doesn't go into.   over the past 2 days he didn't have much of an appetite and I called the vet on Friday after discussing it with my wife and we made "the appointment" for Saturday.  last night, I took him out and he peed a little and the laid down on the ground and I sat with him for about 20 minutes before he would get up and come inside and once he did, he just crumpled again.  this morning before leaving, he threw up some of the food he had last night and it wasn't digested at all.  the rolled up piece of ham I gave him with his pain meds in it was still rolled up and still had the pill in.  long story short, the vet said he agreed it was time after examining him and we did the deed.  afterwards, the vet checked again and he said that initially when he pressed on his belly, he tensed up his stomach s that it was hard for him to feel anything, but after he injected him and his muscles relaxed, he pressed again harder and he said there was a huge tumor in his stomach.

I drove him to my parents out in the country and put him in a nice spot in their backyard.  my daughters and I will go out there in a few weeks and put some marking stones out for him and in the spring we plan on planting a tree over his head.

just wanted to vent a little.....
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EmeraldWarrior420
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« Reply #1 on: January 05, 2013, 06:40:55 PM »

I'm so sorry. My condolences go out to you.
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Jeff
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« Reply #2 on: January 05, 2013, 06:56:54 PM »

I'm sorry to hear this, my friend.  My own dog just turned 13 and suffers from similar issues - hip arthritis and had a toe removed last year because of cancer.  I'm dreading that day and really feel for what a crappy day you've had.
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Perry
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« Reply #3 on: January 06, 2013, 05:49:00 AM »

Really sorry to hear, Cow.

People without dogs (and or cats even) just don't realize the emotional bond that is obtained by having a "pet". I had one guy say that when his dog died, it was like losing a member of the family. I told him no, it IS losing a member of the family.

True story - When one of my friends dog had reached that age that it was better to end the suffering, he made his wife take the dog in. He said he couldn't handle it. Didn't even go to the vets. Really confused me as to why he wouldn't want to "say bye" to his pal. I had always held a little anger towards him, just a tad, for doing that. Until ...

When I had to put my girl Tasha (Chocolate Lab) down for a knotted stomach (she had already gone through 3 surgeries on her hips and chest and she was up there in age). I told the wife that when we take her, I am sitting with her when they inject her, "I don't care what the vet says!".

We got to the vets, filled out the paper work and then the vet asked if I wanted to go in ... I lost it. Just flat out lost it. I could not walk in that room. Please know that I am not a sensitive man, nor am I very emotional (Wife hates I don't even get misty eyed at sad movies), but when they asked that question and took that leash, I just broke down.

I no longer held any animosity, no matter how slight it was, towards my friend Dave.  

Months later, and this time just for age reasons, we had to do the same for Tasha's brother, Tucker. Really a shitty year.

Bottom line, I do understand the grief you feel and while I hope your mourning period is a short one, I am happy to promise you that over time you will think back on your beloved friend (and family member) and smile.

Stay strong, be well and rant on here as much as you need or desire.

EDIT - Also, and this may sound callous, but please don't get another dog for awhile. It will do you, nor the rest of your family any good to do so. Being sad is an important part of the healing process and you will only cause confusion to yourself and your new pet if you get one too soon.
« Last Edit: January 06, 2013, 06:01:46 AM by Perry » Logged

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jedicow
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« Reply #4 on: January 06, 2013, 08:20:32 AM »

thanks guys....

I went to the vets by myself cause my wife and I didn't have anyone to watch the girls.  so last night after posting, I went upstairs and bawled to my wife as I told her all the things the vet had said and done.  it is a lot tougher than I imagined it would be 13 years ago when I got him from the animal shelter just to have some company in my townhouse since I was living alone for the first time in my life and I was a few hours away from my hometown.  I woke up this morning around 6 o'clock to he sound of my daughter walking down the hall and I heard the floorboards creak in that one spot that it always does and my first thought was that chewie was looking for a comfortable spot.  he often got up and moved around at night to be closer to all of us at certain points in the night even before his hips got so bad.  I am going through today noticing all the things that won't happen anymore.  I didn't have to open the backdoor to let him out, I didn't have to check his food and water, I didn't need to leave a few bites of eggs on my plate and put it on the floor for him as a treat.  it just sucks. 

perry, we almost assuredly will not be getting another dog anytime soon if ever.  I hope this doesn't sound callous in anyway, but now we will probably get the new carpeting that we have been needing for years.  we always hated the carpet in our house when we bought it 11 years ago but we lived with it.  when the girls came along, chewie had snagged a few spots with his toe nails and there were a few other stains and spots from both him and the kids.  when we finally started to realize that we NEEDED new carpet, we decided to wait until chewie was not with us any longer.  he was maybe 7 or 8 at the time and we figured we may have 2 or 3 more years with him and he lasted a lot longer than we had thought he might (which we were thrilled about, don't take that the wrong way) and so now we REALLY need it.  also, whenever we went on a trip or vacation we always had to have someone watch him.  we don't have too many friends here that are dog people and the few that would watch him have dogs of their own and in his later years, chewie didn't really like being around other dogs too much.  my parents would always keep him for us, but it was always an issue of when we could get him to them and when we could get him back.  we were also never able to just pick up and go on a weekend trip on spur of the moment due to this.  so now we will have a little freedom (even though we don't really want it the way we got it.  I would rather have him with us for a lot more years to come than to just be able to take a small weekend trip somewhere) to do things like that.

also...right now, I can't imagine having any other dog or pet.  he was a big part of our family even though I feel guilty as hell that when the girls were infants and toddlers, he was largely neglected (attention wise, that is.  he was always fed and had water and always had all of his vet appointments.) and he often got scolded for being in the way sometimes due to our frustration and dwindled energy levels at the time when he was just looking for a pat on the head or a scratch behind the ears.  we often called him our son and my daughters sometimes referred to him as their brother.   but overall, I like to think he had a good life (much better than if he had been left at the shelter and possible if someone else had gotten him before me who didn't care as much.).  he could be lazy in the house all day while we were at work, he was fed very grandly sometimes and almost always got some of what we were having along with his dog food, he always had treats, he got gifts at Christmas, he had blankets and beds, he had squirrels to chase in the backyard, etc.  so, in a few weeks  I will hopefully start to feel better about it.
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Perry
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« Reply #5 on: January 06, 2013, 08:29:28 AM »

...  so, in a few weeks  I will hopefully start to feel better about it.

It will take about a month for the habits (like those you described and others yet to come) and/or the memory of them to not be a part of your life, but yes, that time will come. And of course, as they say, time heals all wounds.
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"I do not have OCD. I know. I've checked. Three or four hundred times and I definitely don't. I stopped myself from catching it by washing my hands an even number of times"
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